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Posts from 01st Jul 2005 to 31st Jul 2005.
Blogging From Uni
   at 18:10 on Thu 28th July 2005
...For the last time. I've just graduated. I'm sure I'll take the time to make a more substantial post about my graduation, but it was great! I am now "Matthew Chapman BSc Hons." and it feels fantastic.

Unfortunately, this is the last time I'll be able to blog from Labs in ECS. I think I'm never able to get in here after today! :-(

Bye bye Labs. Bye bye ECS. Bye bye Southampton. Bye bye Student Matt. Hello Job. Hello Mortgage. Hello Life..... Oh shit.

Hehe.

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by Mac at 10:01 on 29th Jul 2005
Oh no, you've got bots. :(

by Matt at 13:49 on 01st Aug 2005
All sorted, hopefully. Bloody things. :/

A couple of quick things
   at 14:07 on Wed 27th July 2005
Firstly, I need some way of getting my Picture of the Day on the whiteboard at work onto my blog. It's a big guessing game, where the office has to work out what I've drawn... I think it'd be fun to get it on here somehow.

Secondly, why, at least 28 thousand years after the first dildo was made/used, is there still such a taboo over the whole sex toy thing? [The Register]

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Planetarion Quotes
   at 17:18 on Mon 25th July 2005
quotes
#1: <Kloopy> In fact, I think I'll fetch myself a few ice cubes and some cock.
#2: <mummeh> rock is a "family alliance" (until after 9pm, then it's an adults pay per view channel :P)
#3: <KeyMan> i got breasts :P
#4: Reality is an illusion caused by alcohol deficiency.
#5: <Vixen|Bedinamin> My goal is to become a veteranian because i love children
#6: "have you ever noticed that there are people who do things which are most indelicate, & yet at the same time - beautiful?" - EM Forster
#7: <Defender> 68. Call for: [Spinner] Coords: [1:1:1] ETA: [20] Amount: [lots and lots of "features"] Status: [Open] DC in charge: [IE|afk]
#8: <Noctu> At least he didn't find your self porn, Kloopy.
#9: <Raistlin> wait I;m an idiot
#10: <Mendosa> sami is it not true that u once stole a babies pram to take your boooze home <Wingless_Vixen> ive never done that <Wingless_Vixen> have i?
#11: <chip> nevermind <chip> im a dumbass
#12: <{O_o}Libraius> THERE IS NOTHING WRONG WITH THAT QUERY FFS lol <Theo_> ...that fdisk couldn't fix
#13: <Alanna> Saying that Java is nice because it works on all OS's is like saying that anal sex is nice because it works on all genders
#14: <Laz> i need to find a small child
#15: <Laney> i dont wank with my friends <kupo> "Sure".
#16: <NB3|wibble> i cannot watch porn with a very loud celion dion backing sound fs
#17: <MrBrick> THESE NEW SPECIAL TAMPONS WILL ABSORB ALL LEAKAGE <MrBrick> AND YOUR SOUL <MrBrick> Satanex. <MrBrick> FOR THE EVIL WOMAN
#18: <Lil> Stupid fucking cunt <Lil> I can hear german tv <Lil> in my head <MrL_JaKiri> erm <Lil> Is it possible to pick up tv signals in your head MrL_JaKiri
#19: <Lil> I used to hear morse code all the time :( <the_angry_angel> lol what were you smoking at that time lil <Lil> NOTHING <Lil> I was clean.
#20: <MrBrick|Gone> Cat I'd like to fuck <ilovemog> that is so wrong. <MrBrick|Gone> even though its dead <MrBrick|Gone> heh <MrBrick|Gone> it's very wrong <MrBrick|Gone> I apologise <ilovemog> necrophilia <ilovemog> AND bestiality <MrBrick|Gone> I like cats
#21: <Theo_> (I have this habit of hiding porn^W important files)
#22: <Albot> It's not rape when you have a gun
#23: <[ND]Md> there was this guy who asked how he compiled the source <[ND]Md> it was an html file :/
#24: <Lil> someone asked me if LOL was a different version of AOL
#25: <Zanthis(ALE)> AFK, tornado
#26: <janey> ill get u wet later az <janey> dont worry <janey> u wont b left out :-p
#27: <azrael> im playing with myself * jane wanna play 2!!
#28: <Prince> i checked and under the metal health act of 1984 you can be commited for dating gemz for over 4 months
#29: <Karmulian> matt remind me to spank u
#30: <Tekki> I lost my bed with a girl :(
#31: <azreal> gah i just nearly ate some blutack :\
#32: <donkie> i started appreciating girls aloud, elton john, and i woke up at 4:00am next to a guy im sure i did something with
#33: <Hydrax> interesting, when there is talk about adult television I wake up :P
#34: <Laney> i don't spunk gravy
#35: <luva[afk]> sum1 send me a lingerie package;P <luva[afk]> and i am curious:D
#36: <Aer> but ill be forced to give it to one of the girls. ho hum
#37: * angel sucks
#38: <Kloopy> Apparantly, my drum kit is -not- a USB device. I think thats where I went wrong.
#39: <Disruptor> wher is Laney :'( <NB3> in laneyland <NB3> doing laneythings <NB3> with laneypeople <Disruptor> anal sex, in other words. <Gemma> with sheep. <Lil> sounds erotic.
#40: <Lil> so I dont own a rubber fucky <Lil> bad typo.
#41: <NB3> i dont -trust- the bath
#42: <Phil^> its got a powerful nozzle
#43: * the_angry_angel runs for the hills! I am MALE ffs! - <Perro> F**k - <Perro> damn, i picked a man
#44: "Reality...Ah! Yes, now I remember. Its that place where you can touch things!"
#45: "Cannot find REALITY.SYS. Universe halted."
#46: *** RedFox has quit IRC ( Reality is the only obstacle to happiness.) - <the_angry_angel> No - Reality is the only obstacle to having breasts like Lara Croft :)
#47: <[S]cream> i f**ked a chicken in the carpark
#48: <Kush[Gone]> Windows ME has detected you are attempting to download a Good operating system, your computer will now shut down
#49: <Sp8472^busy> i need to get me one of those dildo things
#50: "Step up to red alert - Sir, are you obsolutely sure? It does mean changing the bulb." - Kryten, Red Dwarf
#51: * An-Aragorn looks at his ass....*made in taiwan* ....well..it's not nice bit it works against Lamers with silly rockets...
#52: <`Mace> i dont like going down to my local computer store, i went in to buy a mouse and they convinced my dad he needed a new mother board for his computer
#53: <[ROCK]Slowfinger> TAA = Tits and Ass;)
#54: "ERROR: Keyboard not found. Press F1 to continue..."
#55: <{ROCK}Ice_Queen{Drunky}> I LOVE YOU ALL <[ROCK]Cloaca|busy> no no... u forgot words: 'will', 'make' and 'to'
#56: <{ROCK}Ice_Queen{Drunky}> Ill fuk my babe dats all <{ROCK}Ice_Queen{Drunky}> Im gonn regert dis 2 morroew
#57: <@PhAtMaN> he feeds me a bone everyday..but it goes in my ass first..wich it kinda strange
#58: <Sp8472> Xain: do you have a specific problem with anyone, or do you just have a large trout rammed up your anal sphincter ?
#59: <RawlyM> pa down again? <the_angry_angel> dunno <the_angry_angel> its up and down more times than a pair of newly weds
#60: <TajEn> noob = ? <TajEn> what does that mean? <kubrick> it means he has both a penis and a vagina
#61: <Hotwire> wtf doe sit work in other functiosn then! <Hotwire> i feeking copy pasted the line <the_angry_angel> can someone decode that <Laz> decode what? <Forexs> Do you think its 'cool' to spell like that or do you have a problem controlling your fingers? :P <Airilius> lol two simultaneous lines of bullshit from Hotwire
#62: whilst getting heavily attacked in pa the following irc discussion occured: "Well we've been in this situation before..", "Hell yeah, we've been in IRC thousands of times"
#63: <Ultramar|PUB> bye <the_angry_angel> bye bye <Ugleb> bye? <BOOMER> yes, a 3 letter word <[J]DrK-Assassin> lol <BOOMER> one sylible <the_angry_angel> Ultramar has departed to go to a place to comsume fermented vegetable drinks, to achieve heightened states of incompetance, that is why we said bye
#64: <Seven|hiding> lol <Seven|hiding> not in my teens anymore <OutKold2K> 19 is a good age <Seven|hiding> but addicted to licking
#65: <Hotwire> i wank 85 times a day
#66: <Laz> irc is such a lovely place,,, dispite the fact that a lot of irc servers are used to distribute child porn,,, we at planetarion irc are lovely folk
#67: <Dvir> Sp having fun clicking on the disconnect button? <Forexs> overload of goat porn
#68: <MeTh|pizzza> ack! i think some1 is tryin 2 break into my house! i just saw a kladder go by the window...
#69: <ArchAng3L> i hate hols <ArchAng3L> i go weird
#70: <Terra> -Global- We are sorry for the server problems we have had today, and we are also very sorry to announce that the server database has been infected by a virus and is unforuntaly lost. Planetarion round 7 will restart as soon as we get the problems fixed and round 8 will be given out for free and it will also be random only. Once again we can never be sorry enough.
#71: <chip`studing> Without ice cream life and fame are meaningless.
#72: "640K ought to be enough for anybody." - Bill Gates, 1981
#73: * Althalus holds Judder's soft face in his hands. Looks deep into Judder sparkling eyes. Softly brushes his lips with Judder's and slowly kisses Judder * Althalus has quit IRC (Read error: Connection reset by peer)
#74: <Imniad> In the UK we have water on tap, something we take for granted, but that people in Ethiopia long for.....Now, imagine the UK being women, Ethiopia being men and tapped water being breasts.....Do u see what I mean? That's what annoys me about women, I can't wait for the day when us men (The "Third World" of breasts) will get breasts "on tap" twenty-four hours a day, 365 days a year...
#75: <Althalus> vibrator? <Dark_Crystal> yup <Dark_Crystal> it was on my bed <Dark_Crystal> its now in my lap where i can get to it
#188: <Shamon> HOW can you relate SEX to SNOOKER <NB3> its all a load of balls
#76: <Hotwire> i need a HAND WITH IT
#77: <Hotwire> i have a small nob
#78: <Hotwire> my nob is even smaller tahns Dvir's <Laz> dam,, thats small
#79: <Sariina> a moth just flew into my bra ://///
#80: <Sariina> omg i have a random piece of plastic stuck to my breast :////
#81: <Dark_Crystal> we screwed u guys so bad
#82: If you wish to maintain/admin a network then be prepared to sit a lot of stupid courses in order to earn the right to _TALK_ to very expensive routers and switches.
#83: "perhaps someone Admin shaped would like to have a word?"
#84: * Dark_Crystal strokes it
#85: <Stranger_NL> you p3 = gay - does it ask do upload the demo in the rear ?
#86: <RawlyM> i was going to say that i was old enough to be your mum then
#87: <baikonur> what do you think about: WAR IS PEACE. FREEDOM IS SLAVERY. IGNORANCE IS STRENGTH. HTML IS LAYOUT.
#88: <boris> anyone got the ansi c programming language in pdf format ? <boris> i need it for my girlfiends little brother <boris> as i wont part with my tree copy :)
#89: <targhan> that code has to win the "most errors in as few lines as possible" award
#90: <rageybabey> i have big boobs. <rageybabey> i can suffocate you.
#91: <Alanna> Most channels are like #planetarion with fewer (smart) people in them
#92: <Sp8472> I lost my left testicle in a game of pool
#93: <Sp8472> my hovercraft is full of eels !
#94: <jero> maybe 35-45% of your time writing the code, the rest is writing debug code n crap so that Bob Numnuts doesnt crash the game if he does something crazy to the game.
#95: Read error: EOF from client
#96: 'o, ar, how great thou art. o, cat, where art thou at? I'll use which to find thee, and file(1) to test if binary thou be.'
#97: "A novice was trying to fix a broken lisp machine by turning the power off and on. Knight, seeing what the student was doing spoke sternly, "You cannot fix a machine by just power-cycling it with no understanding of what is going wrong." Knight turned the machine off and on. The machine worked"
#98: Save the whales. Collect the whole set.
#99: We are Pentium of Borg. Division is futile. You will be approximated.
#100: when example source won't compile ... <``Erik> then you f**ked something up <Pie> Nope, I followed their instructions <``Erik> that may've been your problem :}
#101: "Life is wasted on the living." - The Restaurant at the Edge of the Universe
#102: If practice makes perfect, and nobody's perfect, why practice?
#103: <Grendels> (yes, Grendels writes buggy code sometimes too)
#104: <Raspberry> man, SuperGlobals get all the chicks.
#105: <Grendels> my stupidness
#106: <XsAg> My hands are sweating, my pulse is high and i am hyperventilating <Dessenter> Been masturbating again haven't you
#107: <saki> angry angel, you are now like a god to me <saki> you're like engelbert humperdink EyeZ <saki> or dale winton <saki> or some kind of mongrel crossbreed twixt the two
#108: <Glum> damn w0men making orders, but out of respect (and fear) i will obey
#109: <saki> <- offically more gay than julian clairy and graham norton put toghether :S
#110: <harsheh> "i see welsh people"
#111: <Forexs> okay, yes, I am the official pimpsuits.net model.
#112: * Viry wonders how many welsh ppl r pr0n starz
#113: <Tauc_Fox|Away> comes with free love wax
#114: <DreTheMaster> shit i dont have msn <DreTheMaster> what should i do?? <EyeZ> jump around nakked with ur balls on fire <killaH> I did that once, didn't work <Qin> it worked for me
#115: <Duck[coding]> phpcomplete.com * Rag|W00T wanders away to phpcomplete.net
#116: * Toplet makes love to teh sheep
#117: <Noctu|Gone> I don't need extra dangly bits. :/
#118: <Toplet> im a chick with a dick
#119: <phR4G_M4ch1n3> i laff at goat sex hahahahaha
#120: <globester> i want boobs <globester> i'd play with'm when bored <globester> bounce'm up and down <globester> etc :/
#121: <Disc> SUPERFLY IF YA COME BACK FROM GAMING, WAIT 10MINS, IM DIEING FOR A CRAP, WHEN I FART I ALMOST FOLLOW THROUGH <Disc> ahh shit that was supposed to be msg not amsg
#122: <GM_Hamster> i was attacked by shredded wheat once
#123: <Toplet> cream comes tomatoes
#124: <snazbaz> unfortuantly women have it programmed into them to automatically choose shit men
#125: <llamafarmer> apache is like the OS that PHP runs on? * tiberious nuts Laz for confusing llamas
#126: <Zorlon> Actually I havent got a goatee at all, I back-comb my anal beard :P
#127: <@Shamon> id be in my fucking punto sx <@Shamon> 0-60 in 5 minutes :D
#128: <@Laish> townies rock
#129: <@Lunaria> heh sha is blonde because he went into college and realised he had no lectures
#130: * @Shamon admires his big penis posters
#131: <@Proto> munky <@Proto> they don't appreciate you like us =/ <@Proto> i'd fuck your brains out if i was female
#132: <@kupo> why ravisher<@kupo> if you ever did take me out to a drink <@kupo> i'm sure i'd end up bonking yo
#133: <@teen> I don't want bush to attack yet, our history teacher will give us all candy if he doesn't attack by friday
#134: <@MrBrick> I bought a weeks shopping for 5.20 <MrBrick> 50 bread rolls for 1 pound <MrBrick> I stole toilet paper from Safeways toilets
#135: <@Shamon> oh god <@Shamon> why am i flirting with a guy on msn :/
#136: <@Shamon> i want to meet lil and fuck his brains out
#137: <@Noctu> Go and rape yourself with a roadcone.
#138: <@MrBrick> and Zor looks like a member of Take That
#139: <@Bobzy> Midget porn is sexy.
#140: <Pineapple> im a big gay poofter
#141: <@MrBrick> I feel so fucking girly when I have run round the house naked looking for a FUCKING HAIRBAND
#142: <dzen> I wank old men for money.
#143: <@MrBrick> YOU ARE ALL SHIT! <@MrBrick> RIGHT <@MrBrick> YOU ARE LESS SHIT <@MrBrick> heh <@MrBrick> still shit though.
#144: <@Shamon> LIL COME TO CREWE AND IL SUCK YOU OFF
#145: <@jane> ooooooooh Lilly <@Lil> I'm pleasuring jane, it seems <@Lil> Scream my name! * @jane screams Lil!!
#146: <Lunaria> lucky my breasts are small and humble
#147: * @Laney rubs corned beef in his pubes
#148: <MrBrick> I ran in to the bedroom at 4am <MrBrick> screaming <MrBrick> MY BOLLOCKS ARE ON FIRE. <MrBrick> she laughed. <MrBrick> I cooked.
#149: <Shamon> I TAKE IT UP THE ARSE EVERYBODY <Shamon> :/
#150: <kupohot> i'm into steaks and BIG WADS OF MEAT
#151: <Laney> my rabbit ran away <Laney> and then we had rabbit for dinner <Laney> i cried many times
#152: <Jack> how odd <Jack> I keep smelling hash <Jack> at random times
#153: <@MrBrick> LEGOLAS HAS NO PENIS, THE NO-PENISED BASTARD
#154: <Laish> if i could tell you one thing in life <Laish> always wear matchin underwear incase u get hit by a bus
#155: <Lil> SHAMON <Shamon> LIL <Lil> THE DINOSAURS ARE EXTINCT <Lil> 'CAUSE U TOUCH URSELF AT NIGHT <Shamon> i wank at night
#156: <Jack> every time you wank <Jack> god kills a kitten <Shamon> i hate cats anyway <Laish> i only ever wank at night <Laish> ok lies i wank all day
#157: <Ryuujin> lil will you be my pimp?
#158: <Jack> punch her in the neck while you're at it, it'll make her butt muscles tense <Jack> makes for great lovin'
#159: <Shamon> HOW can you relate SEX to SNOOKER <NB3> its all a load of balls
#160: <@Noctu> Is she fit? <@Laney> how the fuck do i know shes MY SISTER!!! <@Noctu> Naked pics ta. <@Noctu> <He does have them> <@Noctu> <He told me>
#161: <Noctu> I got sent to see my head of year once. <Noctu> Walked out. <Noctu> Realised I didn't know where the office was. <Noctu> Stood there for a bit. <Noctu> Got bored. <Noctu> Had a piss. <Noctu> Went to town.
#162: <Jack> theres this sign outside anne summers <Jack> that says 'smile if you had an orgasm last night' <Jack> and people see it and start crying
#163: <NB3> Argentinian inventors have created a strap-on rubber duck which they claim will combat tiredness
#164: <Narf_AE> everyone who had a sexchange in the last months rais ur hands! <Noctu> I had two.
#165: <@jen> I WALKED IN ON MY SISTER GETTING...LICKED OUT!
#166: <Noctu> i rape rabbits
#167: * Revol do a little dance * Revol make a little love * Revol get down tonight <Joe> Revol please stop sucking my cock <Revol> no <Revol> *shlurp* <[BB]Spiry> its fucking massive
#168: <Laney> I LOVE GAY MEN
#169: <Stormhawk> I just spilt hot potnoodle on the tip of my penis!
#170: * Lunz|bog is now known as Lunaria <Lunaria> I AM NOW 5LBS LIGHTER | <Proto> i pulled a dog! | <Proto> i've worn womens clothes before
#171: * @Proto feels really gay
#172: <[Fury]Ravisher> irc is for geeks <Lil> and Laish's <[Fury]Ravisher> yes and Laish's
#173: <MrBrick> I WILL SHOW NOCTU MY PENIS
#174: <@Gemma> im gonna sell my eggs <@Kyrae> dinner time
#175: <Laney> have you got an argos showroom house <MrBrick> yes <MrBrick> :D <MrBrick> 2.5grand spent in argos :D
#176: * Lil honks jack's tits * Lil giggles and runs off * Jack covers his tits with teacups
#177: <Lunaria> im sure thats the average <Lunaria> for like unerect <Vyse> whats wrong with having an amazingly small penis?
#178: <Proto> it'd turn into a 24/7 pr0n <Shamon> finger puppet shoes <Shamon> consisting of 'mr dildo' and 'pam the pulsating pussy'
#179: <Denial> anyway, i decided to get out of bed and somehow moved backward to twist myself around <Denial> fell out of my bed backwards <Denial> hurt my wrist and back and probably head <Denial> was going to punch the wall in blind anger but thought better of it, as that ones only jsut been replastered :/
#180: <Spiry> i wanked too much already today <Spiry> kinda sore
#181: <Lil> I love you honey =/ <Laney> I love you too :/
#182: <@Spiry> we watched a video of a guy fapping underneath bed sheets :/
#183: <Ravisher> when a man and a woman love each other very much <Ravisher> they can come together and get married and if they're evil the stork brings them a Sturge <Ravisher> it's a marvel of nature
#184: <@Gemma|stuff> id love to see Ravisher licking chocolate spread off an arse
#185: <@Noctu|REpub> I HOPE YOU DIE IN YOUR SLEEP. <@Noctu|REpub> CHOKE ON YOUR OWN SPUNK. <@Noctu|REpub> WHICH YOU HAVE FIRED. <@Noctu|REpub> ERRANTLY. <@Noctu|REpub> IN YOUR SLEEP.
#186: <@Noctu> The very existence of flame-throwers proves that some time, somewhere, someone said to themselves, You know, I want to set those people over there on fire, but I'm just not close enough to get the job done.
#187: <@wyre> go poke yourself in your poo-hole
#189: <Heartless> War is god's way of teaching Americans geography.
#190: <Alex (In the pub)> ...theres this man on my poster screaming, but you can't hear him.
#191: <Theory> breakfast time [14:44:02]
#192: <ph8> can you use wildcards in include?
#193: <chip> php-devs do not care about crash bugs <chip> most -devs do
#194: <Suaver> i just got a fucking electric shock from my computer
#195: <Theory|AWAY> does anyone else find pi tends to go missing when you are doing maths homework while hungry?
#196: <^_^> "I am" is supposedly the shortest sentance in the English langauge. Could it be that "I do" is the longest?
#197: <ph8> I love newbie networks <ph8> two eggdrops just kept a turkish guy talking for 5 minutes
#198: <ph8> my mum just said that she thought the internet was closed on sundays
#199: <chip> someone fix london
#200: <keyman> brb im gonna go read the PHP fat book on the bog
#201: <Tyroka> ehrm, I\'m not sure about u Knoddy but most usually don\'t fall asleep while having sex
#202: <Assassin> omg I can put both my hands in my anus!
#203: <RavenTooth> hey, the paper says that MacDonalds has 1337 outlets globally
#204: <Speh> lol, 5 days without washing <Speh> my hair would grow legs and leave
#205: <Theory> waking up and finding yourself wearing a dress is a very surreal experience
#206: * Tauc_RedFox recommends walking around naked in your living room ;)
#207: <Laz> i dont smoke weed nower days <Laz> its poo <Laz> although i am growing 3 plants <Laz> they\'re my babies <SIR-Millar> only on irc <SIR-Millar> would you hear something like that


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Disorganised
   at 14:48 on Mon 25th July 2005
I'm really quite disorganised. A week after getting my flat and I've still got loads of unpacking to do and utilities to sort out, etc.

The flat warming party was fun. It was great to see people from Uni again, and I got to cook my first communial meal(ish). We had a full English for breakfast. My oven takes ages to heat up.

Oh, and if you haven't already but in the future want to watch or read Dave Gorman's Googlewhack Adventure (and I thoroughly recommend you do) I'd just like you to realise the book is better than the DVD. The DVD is great for a few laughs, but most of the book is funnier still. I am at work and really have no motivation to write a review of the story, so just go and read (or watch) it, you wont be sorry.

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by Andrew at 01:02 on 30th Jul 2005
I'm still tired from it

US Patriot Act
   at 09:42 on Fri 22nd July 2005
Now, I try not to get wound up by politics, especially foreign stuff. But the way the Bush administration is running the US terrifies me. The way they're taking away freedom and introducing law after law which slowly removes constitutional rights and the peoples voice. The way they're alienating themselves from the rest of the world is so damaging to the entire globe.

I've always been shit at getting my point of view over about things I think strongly about. I never know how to word things like I'm thinking them. But it's interesting to note the following similarity between Hitler's run in power and the current US government. It sums up just what the US is currently doing, and it was the tactic of Hitlers people. It can't be deemed anything but frightening, surely:

"Of course the people don't want war. But after all, it's the leaders of the country who determine the policy, and it's always a simple matter to drag the people along whether it's a democracy, a fascist dictatorship, or a parliament, or a communist dictatorship. Voice or no voice, the people can always be brought to the bidding of the leaders. That is easy. All you have to do is tell them they are being attacked, and denounce the pacifists for lack of patriotism, and exposing the country to greater danger." -- Herman Goering, Adolf Hitler's right hand man, at the Nuremberg trials

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Flat Warming
   at 14:36 on Thu 21st July 2005
I've lost track of who I've invited to my flat warming and who I haven't. So if you read this and haven't had one, but know I would invite you, then come along. Those who I'd invite I guess would have my mobile number. The flat is in Hitchin. We're doing stuff from Saturday afternoon to Sunday afternoon, sleep over in my flat if you can find somewhere to kip, bring your own sleeping bag.

Get in touch if you can come.

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by Clare at 18:03 on 21st Jul 2005
Damnit. More notice and I wouldn't have arranged to go to Cardiff this weekend!

Have a good one, though.

by EvilRich at 08:05 on 22nd Jul 2005
Likewise! (The more notice bit that is. I'm not going to Cardiff.) Have a fun weekend, guess I'll see you next Thursday!

by Matt at 09:44 on 22nd Jul 2005
Clare: Apologies for the lack of notice, I really should have been more organised. :/
Rich: Same but yeah I will, and looking forward to it!

by Clare at 17:49 on 22nd Jul 2005
Eh, these things happen. I imagine I'll be floating around on Thursday too, so hopefully see ya then :)

by David Hasselhoff at 23:43 on 22nd Jul 2005
Damn I'm busy this weekend too :(

Google Moon
   at 08:11 on Wed 20th July 2005
If you haven't seen it yet, Google are commemorating the first lunar landing on July 20th 1969. If you browse over to http://moon.google.com/ you'll see you can take a look around the moon's surface yourself.

It's nothing special, until you zoom all the way into the moons surface. Go and try it! :)

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by mad_gemma at 11:29 on 20th Jul 2005
its making me hungry... :(

but damn cool nonetheless

Daddy Longlegs
   at 09:22 on Sun 17th July 2005
I've got a quick story to tell... my wallet was heavy as I picked it up just now and that reminded me. As I mentioned, I was at Laura's for her party last night. We had the patio door open to get some cool evening air into the house and insects were gate crashing.

Someone suggested eating, for some bizzare reason, the dragonfly that had just flown in. I think it was Naomi who said she wouldn't eat it if you paid her. And I said I would. Be paid to eat it I mean, not pay her.

So Tom offered that he'd pay me a fiver to eat it, then backed down (the coward.). Anyway, one thing led to another and everyone chipped in to make a kitty of over a fiver. So I ate it.

And I'm not going to tell you how it tasted as I'd like to leave an air of mystery about the whole thing.

Oh, and it was live. And I chewed it. And one of it's legs got stuck in my teeth. Yum.

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by Arleen at 18:26 on 01st Aug 2005
omg :( did u pit any spices and herbs on it :\

In My Place
   at 08:27 on Sun 17th July 2005
Ok. So I've got my flat. It's fantastic. I love it. I spent hundreds of pounds on things like a fridge freezer, a sofa bed, a matress and a computer desk yesterday. I love my flat, I love it all.

I was at Laura's for her Birthday celebration last night. There were lots of people and not much sleeping space, so shared a taxi back to my flat. I think that I secretly wanted to spend the night here, the first night in my real flat. :D

In fact, I was so excited when I got back, absolutely drunk, that I spent ages just looking at everything. I woke up this morning to find my sofa bed out to sofa 'mode', my shirt in the lounge, my trousers in the hall and my socks in the kitchen. I've no idea whether I got undressed as I was looking around or if I just put my dirty clothes in every room simply because I can. Either way, I'm pretty blood proud!


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Wheee
   at 09:51 on Fri 15th July 2005
I rarely get overly emotional about things. But I'm absolutely bloody excited. I've exchanged. I'm now a home owner. Me. Little ol' me.

So who's coming to the Flat Warming?!

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by Clare at 07:55 on 16th Jul 2005
Me me me! *poing*

Congrats on being all (allegedly) Grown Up And Mature. :)

by mad_gemma at 16:18 on 19th Jul 2005
did someone mention the word "party"?

(well, ok, imply a party :))

congrats btw :)

Friday 15th July 2005
   at 08:38 on Fri 15th July 2005
Ok, so it all MIGHT happen today. I'm waiting for a phone call from my soliciter right now to tell me exchange of contracts has happened. And it's exciting. If all goes well, in little over a few hours I'll be a home owner.

I've already decided that the first thing I'm going to do this afternoon when I've collected MY key is go to MY flat, open MY front door, check that each of MY rooms is there as on the floor plan and then open a can of lager and drink some in each of MY rooms. I'll turn all MY lights on and off and open and close MY curtains. It'll be great!

I feel like a little kid at Christmas, which is probably not the type of mood a responsible, mature, new home owner should be in. :P

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Taking Risks
   at 15:35 on Wed 13th July 2005
Today, I have been mostly taking risks... I have purchased my contents insurance for the flat. This is a risk because until exchange, the deal isn't set in stone; The sellers could still pull out. But because I'm going for a simultaneous exchange and completion, I've no time to get insurance on Friday itself.

Another risk I've taken is signing up for my phone and broadband with Bulldog. The reason this is a risk is because their customer service is SHIT from what I've read. The phones are constantly engaged, they commonly make mistakes with orders placed through them, they let their activation dates slip by as much as months. But I only learnt all this when, having signed up and created a Direct Debit transfer, they gave me forums access. I've spent a fair while reading story after awful stories of people with problems that plague the Bulldog support forums.

Luckily, I still have my Athens username and password, so I trundled off to FAME to get all the company information about Bulldog that I could. Thankfully, there is a direct contact number for one of thier trading addresses. So if I have problems and don't get responces to phone calls or email, I know what to do.

Thinking about it, I've never heard anyone attempt to install phone and internet without major delays and customer service issues. How crap.

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by Mac at 08:33 on 14th Jul 2005
We're going with Bulldog too. Hopefully it'll all be ok.

Although, they haven't yet sent me my welcome email and I can't log into their site with my reference number. Pah.

by Matt at 11:17 on 14th Jul 2005
I've signed up for a new line with them. So they've emailed me today asking me to enter a BT account number into my Account Details page (when logged in). Firstly, I asked for a new line so have no BT number, secondly there is no BT account number section on the Account Details page!

*sigh*

Three Days to Go
   at 13:20 on Tue 12th July 2005
I've just spoken to my mortgage lender to see whether they will be able to release the funds for my mortgage on Thursday as requested. By calling and making the customer services bloke pull up my details, their system has made the connection between the last documentation they needed and this morning post and Thursday for the funds is apparantly now confirmed.

Which means... it's only the sellers changing thier minds that can cause this to fall apart now.

I can get finding some broadband and contents insurance now. :D

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And The Tables Turn
   at 14:13 on Mon 11th July 2005
The mortgage charge issue is sorted, we've got new title deeds that have the charge removed.

The request for a retention has been denied, but that's not really MUCH of an issue because the freeholders have given best estimate values for the previous two service charge years. Any shortfall is still the responsibility of the seller, it only becomes an issue if they leave the country and I can't track them down.

The wall could be an issue, but we're going ahead anyway. It's caused no problems in the two and a half years since the work was done and there's always the assumption that the builders wouldn't have done the work without being sure of the structural stability.

In other words, there are now two things which a simultaneous exchange and completion on Friday hinge on. The first is the seller not changing their time and the second is the bank releasing my mortgage by Thursday afternoon. I'm calling the bank tomorrow to explain the urgency and hopefully they'll get moving quickly.

So, hopefully I'll never blog on a Monday again without my own home to do it from.

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by ben dover at 13:17 on 18th Jul 2005
i h8 you because on the bus you threw eggs at me when i was 12! why would you do that! WHY!!!!

More on The Flat
   at 10:49 on Fri 8th July 2005
I met with my soliciter yesterday evening and got some bad news.

There are three remaining issues.
  1. The wall that was removed 2 and a half years ago has now been given retrospective permission, but it's on the assumption that all planning and building regulation applications that had to be made were successful. Building Reg's weren't and they should have been. Basically, to check whether the wall was structural or not and if it was safe to be removed. There have been no obvious problems in those 2 and a half years, but if any come up when the flat is mine, I have to foot the bill to fix them.

  2. The sellers soliciters haven't agreed to a retainer. When I buy the property, I will be getting it mid-financial year. I will pay service charges from the day of completion; Up to that day, the seller pays. However, the amount for the year is unknown until April next year and so their portion can only be based on a guesstimate. Basically a retainer is a sum of money (usually 500) which the soliciter keeps. At the end of the Service Charge year (April), when the actual amount of charges is known any shortfall in the predicted amount paid by the seller is taken out of this kitty.

    This retainer will also be used to pay any shortfall on the roof repair which I mentioned some time in the past. This is predicted to be just under 3000. But the work has been completed, so the freeholder's estimate should be pretty damn accurate.

    If the seller refuses to keep a retainer (which is unusual) then any shortfall has to be picked up by me. So, hopefully, we'll get their agreement.

  3. And this is the big one.... The block of flats used to be owned by the council. When it was first purchased a discounted mortgage was offered to the buyer. If, during the first three years of this mortgage, the property was sold on, a charge had to be paid. The sellers I'm buying from purchased the flat with 5 months left of the 3 year period. For some reason, the charge was not paid.

    Ideally, it should have been sorted at the time my sellers purchased the flat, but through some administrative cockup it wasn't. I've been strongly advised not to continue with the flat with the charge still standing as it could be anything. 1000, 5000, noone knows. In the best case scenario, we get the sellers soliciters to sort it. We get their written confirmation that it is/was their issue and they will sort it out. With that letter, I'm not liable to pay the charge and we can just forget about it.

    But they haven't given us that word, despite having asked for it.
My soliciter is calling the seller's today to try and sort out issues 2 and 3. I can cope with bad news on point 2, but if they aren't cooporative with point 3 then I'm really in the shit.

As for point 1, I was meant to bring with me to work the phone number of the people who carried out the work on the flat, but I forgot. I'll call them this evening and hopefully get some word from them on whether the wall was important or not.

So unless my soliciter has amazing luck in sorting things today, it looks like I could be delayed by ANOTHER week at the very best. Don't these people realise I just want to move in?!

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by Gordon at 13:02 on 08th Jul 2005
Sounds nasty. Is there any chance of getting a 'standalone' house that doesn't have all these leasing issues? Buying seems to be really tricky - A few guys at work have been trying for quite a while.

by Matt at 14:56 on 08th Jul 2005
Yeah, I could go for a freehold property, where it's usually MUCH easier. But it's VERY difficult to find a flat that's freehold because management companies purchase the whole block freehold and lease each flat out individually. And there's no way I can afford anything more than a flat. So I'm pretty stuck in what I'm doing. :/

My Cool Driver
   at 08:39 on Fri 8th July 2005
I'm staying with Laura in Pirton at the moment, whilst my flat gets sorted. I'm getting the bus into Hitchin and then the train to Stevenage every morning. It's not a problem really, it gives me a nice hour to read.

But I just wanted to share my love for the bus driver; It's the same guy every morning. Whilst driving down the small lanes towards Hitchin he invariably encounters oncoming traffic. And this is where he shines. He's the most stubborn git I've ever seen. He stops his bus with JUST enough room for the oncoming car to pass. The car stops, waits for the bus to try and squeeze past, but the driver just sits there with his arms crossed.

So the car trys to pass, gives up and reverses up the road a bit. But the driver still just sits there. Eventually, after a big stare and some rather strong body language, the car ends up having to squeeze through between the bushes and bus with less than an inch either side to spare.

What makes it so much better is that the driver wears shades. He's so cool!

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Moving Home
   at 11:35 on Mon 4th July 2005
It's insane, the amount of paper work involved in house moving. There are a couple of remaining issues on my flat now, before I can exchange contracts and there have been for a few weeks. My soliciter has been fantastic, he's been chasing up the seller's soliciter many times and has placed numerous calls to the freeholder.

But they're taking so long. Originally, my soliciter thought he'd have the a responce to all the remaining things by the end of last week, so that we could inform my mortgage lender that we'd be exchanging and completing this Friday.

But having spoken to my soliciter just now, it's not likely that the responces will come today, and they didn't arrive last week, so this Friday is looking unlikely now. It's so piss annoying, I'd like to get all my stuff down from my parents, move and settle in and get everything sorted. This interim period is quite frustrating.

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by Names at 16:11 on 06th Jul 2005
Boo. Does your So'ton email still work? I wasn't sure. Anyway, I'm supposed to tell you: www.thefacebook.com and also 'squashing aphids with Catie'. Think that's all.

by Matt at 08:34 on 08th Jul 2005
Names, thanks.. I'll take a "coffee break" later and have a look. :-) My soton adress stops at the end of this month. You can email matt at kloopy.com to get me these days, I should really email everyone to tell them that.

Ozz1a, I didn't know I had their album on my fun list, so I've no idea how you could download it, sorry.