Posts from 01st Oct 2004 to 31st Oct 2004.
I've never done one of these before, but here goes;
i n f o r m a t i o n
1. name: Matthew
2. single or taken: single
3. sex: male
4. birthday: 11th April 1984
6. siblings: one sister, Kele (I thought this said children) :/
7. hair color: Brown
8. eye color: Brown
9. shoe size: 11
10. height: |-----------------| < that tall
r e l a t i o n s h i p s
1. who are your best friends? those who care about me
2. do you have a boyfriend/girlfriend?: not currently
f a s h i o n s t u f f
1. where is your favorite place to shop: the internet
2. any tattoos or piercings: none
s p e c i f i c s
1. do you do drugs?: nope
2. what kind of shampoo do you use?: Pantene Pro V
3. what are you most scared of?: False accusation oor rejection from someone I love.
4. who is the last person that called you?: Actually, a mobile number that's not in my phone book.
5. When do you want to get married?: when the girl whom I truely loves realises we should be together
6. What would you change about yourself?: the way I can never remember even my best friends birth dates
f a v o r i t e s
1. color: blue, black, silver
2. food: full cooked English breakfast
3. boys names (3): Julian, Matthew (honestly), Thomas
4. girls names (3): Lucy, Ruby, Hayley.
5. subjects in school: Further Maths (used my mind), Physics (never worked, just played)
6. animals: dolphins
7. sports: speed drinking
h a v e y o u e v e r
1. given anyone a bath?: yes
2. smoked?: yes
3. bungee jumped?: the world's biggest
4. made yourself throw up?: no
5. skinny dipped?: yes
6: ever been in love?: certainly
7. made yourself cry to get out of trouble?: not that I remember
9. actually seen your crush naked?: perhaps, I'm not 100% sure it was her. (hehe)
10. cried when someone died?: Yes
11. lied: not to offend, only white lies.
12. fallen for your best friend?: Yes (more than once?)
13. been rejected?: Yes
14. rejected someone?: Yes, sorry.
15. used someone?: Again, not in an offensive manner.
16. done something you regret?: Every time I've been drinking since I got to Uni?
c u r r e n t
clothes: Shirt and trousers.
music: Sigur Rós - Hún Jörð
make-up: Come off it... :/
annoyance: balancing social life, uni work and paid work
book you're reading: I don't have time, which upsets me.
in cdplayer: Sigur Ros - Von; Runrig - Pro Terra; Matteh's Crazeh Compilation (2000)
in dvd player: Empty
color of toenails: A shade slightly between flesh and grey.
l a s t p e r s o n
you touched: Big Richard's shoulder.
hugged: Uni Clare, just before departing to the swimming pool.
you yelled at: Chris housemate, when he made mu jump when immersed in Doom 3.
you kissed: You see, here, I'd give her name. She'll know who she is, (by definition) but the thing is, I could get in trouble for being honest here. Thinking cleverly here, I can safely say her names has an "I" in it (full name). Hah.
a r e y o u
understanding: I try to make this my best quality.
open-minded: As much as I can be.
arrogant: Unfortunately, once in a while.
insecure: Not externally, but on the inside, which people rarely get to see, I think I am.
interesting: perhaps from an observational point of view. In general interestingness, I reckon I'm a run-off-the-mill sort of person.
random: This one adjective sum's me up.
hungry: Extremely, not had any tea.
smart: See point 3 in this section and the fact that I'm at one of the best Uni's in the country for CompSci.
moody: On a long-term basis. I go through many-week long cycles of moods.
organized: When it comes to the crunch, certainly. Before that, I'm relaxed.
shy: If you know past my extrovert exterior, then you'd understand me saying "very".
difficult: No, I'd like to think not.
attractive: Surely beauty is in the eye of the beholder?
messy: Hehe, at the moment, yes.
r a n d o m
In the morning I: Close my eyes and try to remember why I'm so lucky with what I have.
Love is: Something I have, something I want to share, something I can't keep to myself, something I need to feel.
I dream about: Unfortunately, I rarely remember my dreams. I only ever seem to remember them when I'm interrupted in my sleep.
o p p o s i t e s e x
what do you notice first: The person as a whole. It's their smile, their eyes, their posture, their body language, all the subtle things. I find myself sometimes saying aloud "Wow" at the sight of someone and not knowing exactly what it is about them that attracts me.
Personality: Witty, Serious and playful, Intelligent, Kind, Thoughtful, Sensitive, Cuddly and warm.
worst question to ask: Do you have a third nipple?
who makes you laugh the most? People in groups, the way everyone pools thier humor by playing off each other and letting it grow into hilarious jokes.
who makes you smile? Anyone I make happy or makes me happy.
who do you have a crush on? Again, it's those people with "i" in their name.
d o y o u e v e r
sit on the internet all night waiting for that someone special to im you?: When I sit online, it's never waiting for someone, but I still hope they come online.
wish you were a member of the opposite sex?: Not at all.
wish you were younger: Nope.
cry because someone said something about you?: On occasion.
n u m b e r
of times i have had my heart broken: I could count them on one hand. I usually get up off the floor from a blow like that and carry on.
of hearts i have broken: None without good reason.
of guys/girls you kissed: Lots? Does it matter. Each one (apart from that girl from Monty last year) had meaning in it, which, in my books, if far more important than quantitiy.
of continents i have lived in: Just the one.
of tight friends: Three quarters of a dozen, ish?
of cds i own: Including games, about 30/40?
of scars on your body: Two that come to mind instantly. (Where I cracked my skull and on my wrist where I got a deep cut from my CD drive)
f i n a l q u e s t i o n s
1. do you like fillings these out?: This is my first time, I've not formed an opinion.
2. gold or silver: White gold.
3. what was the last film you saw at the movies? Open Water, or something. That one where the two people are left in the ocean and die. You see, it was so crap it left such an impression I can't even remember the name.
7. favorite cartoon/anime?: The Animatrix, perhaps.
8. what did you have for breakfast this morning?: Fresh air in the rain on the way to campus, and enjoyed it.
9. you love being locked in a room with?: Either; a good friend who I can talk to non-stop without feeling akward -or- myself with a nice selection of music and a comfy place to lie down.
11. could you live without your computer?: I'm afraid not.
12. would you color your hair? I quite like my hair black, like when it's wet. But probably not.
13. could you ever get off the computer?: I do... Sleep is important.
14. habla espanol? Erm, no?
15. how many people are on your buddy list?: Budy list? If you're on about MSN, it's something like 150, the maximum it allows. But I hardly know the majority of them.
16. drink alcohol?: Too often, and in too great a quantity. :/
17. time: 02:03 British Summer Time
I can't remember whether I've mentioned recently, but for at least a week now, I've been making a concious effort to cut down on my drinking. This news may well come as a shock, especially to those who know just how bad I've been at Uni for binge drinking.
But tonight, Chris (housemate) and I decided to try something rather quite special. I'd like to name it Snakebite Extreme.
To make snakebite extreme you need some blackcurrant cordial (or that really strong squash stuff), one can of lager and one can of cider. The drink gets it's name from the particular brands we have chosen;
Lager: Tennent's Super @ 9.0abv
Cider: K @ 8.4abv
It's a very tastey drink and as far as I can tell, it gets to your head rather well.
I expect at least Andrew (housemate - sorely missed) and Catie (abroad - sorely missed) to both be proud that I have been buying cider. But I'd be astonished if there was no shock on their faces when I say that I had a couple of gulps of K and actually quite liked it.
So, cutting down the mid-week drinking is going PERFECTLY. *smiles*
For the first time in my life, the death of someone famous really hit me. When I learnt about John Peel's death today, I felt genuine sadness.
His magic for me was the way he brought so much alternative music into the commercial world. He broadened the music industry and was the break through that countless bands were after.
I had a great deal of respect for him and for his show. I regret not listening to him more than I did, I suppose I took it for granted that he'd be on Radio 1 Tuesday to Thursday every week and that I could listen any time.
On a personal level, he introduced me to so many bands. So much so that the majority of CDs I purchased last academic year were influenced heavily by the music he plays on his show.
He is absolutely irreplacable, his unique style, unique voice and most importantly the unique way he cared about music. John Peel was special, and it upsets me to see him leave.
I feel for his family, friends and colleagues whom this will hit worst. And as he departs, he derseves to be remembered eternally for the outstanding work he has done for music globally.
I've just been speaking to people on IRC about blogs and we've been thinking back to the academic year that's just finished. One thing I remember well is how much train travelling I did to visit people and all the cost I incured from those train tickets.
But like I do alot of the time, I'm not feeling guilt and annoyance that I'm not keeping in contact with alot of my friends, from home especially. I think about them and wonder how they're doing and if they're well all the time. But I never seem to have the time to get in contact. I'm always doing something, however trivial it is.
Sometimes I even open up my email client and begin to write an email to people, realising that I don't have much to say. I could tell people about boring day to day life for me at Uni, but they live similar things themselves, so that's pointless. Other than that, there's not much small talk to give. I like listening to people talking about the things they've done, however little they are. I suppose others might like to listen to my nonsense, but it feels silly doing it.
I blame the way society has completely nullified the question "How are you?". I try to make the effort to make sure I am interested when I ask it rather than idlying asking and ignoring the responce. I've pondered just sending an email asking that simple question, but somehow I can't quite get the sincerity I wish in a plain text message.
If you're reading, I'd love to know; How are you doing, academically, socially, healthwise, emotionally, boy/girlfriend wise, just in general?
It's really strange the way people write love letters, rather than talking. I'd much rather be told that someone loves me face to face, rather than by letter. But that's beside the point, people do write them, as I discovered last year.
About fifty three weeks ago, at the start of my second year at Uni, I was walking up to campus to do a little bit of coursework. On my way, I discovered half a love letter laying in a small puddle on the ground.
Originally, it was written on both sides of a single sheet of notebook paper and folded down the middle. However, the letter had been torn down the middle and I've ended up with only the top half of the page. So, as you can picture, I have the first and third quarters.
The letter has been a complete mystery for everyone who has seen it during the past 12 months. We're not even sure if it was written by a male or female. The structure and word content would suggest that a boy wrote it, however the handwriting style is very feminine.
Rather than type out the content of the sections I have, I've scanned and uploaded them. I'd be interested to see what anyone who reads this thinks of the letter. Suggestions of the history of their relationship are more than welcome. :-)
If you are the author or recipient, or you know who either of them are, please let me know!
I wonder if there's a temp invented for blog apathy. I've got so much to say about Uni starting, my 3rd year project, the fun I've got the following couple of weekend, my huge credit card bill and what it's been spent on, health problems back at home, the freebies I've been collected recently, what I think of 24 (to which I was recently introduced), the huge amount of swimming I've been doing, the idea that I'm going to cut down my alcohol intake a huge amount. All this fun and nothing to make me put it down on e-paper.
But what I'll tell you right now is that I've got Beautiful Day by U2 playing, looking out of the window at the sunny sky and feeling good.
For the last time, I start my academic year. It's quite frightening in some ways. I was reading a "Student Life" booklet that's been distributed around campus for the Freshers, last night. It had a couple of introduction paragraphs about how getting a degree is just half of University, and the that other two thirds are fun and games. It's going out and getting drunk, not worrying about money and getting into debt, it's about eating bad food, getting the worst sleeping pattern you'll have in your life and - I guess - making sure you have the feeling I get right now.
Despite all the bad that's happened since I joined over two years ago, I've had the time of my life. I'm spending ages just thinking back through everything that's happened. All those little memories that make up one massive collage of fun bring a huge smile to my face. All the people I've met along the way, the friends I've made and the things we've all done.
Life is good. Life is very good. And in these last 9 months of play time, before I go out into the grown up real world, it's just going to get better.
I was just walking back from an early swim on campus followed by a lovely breakfast of fresh Pain Au Chocolat. This group of about 7 children walked past me in the opposite direction, but I'm only concerned with one. The group were taking a dog for a walk and it tried to get attention from me, but I smiled politely and kept walking.
The child I am concerned with - who couldn't have been more than 7 or 8 - was sucking a bright green lolly pop and was about this tall; <------------->.
He turned to me when I smiled at the dog and said "Stop looking at the dog, y' dick."
You really have to wonder what sort of parents these abusive, ignorant children have. It worrys me, really. But what's even more scarey is the images I conjur when I imagine what sort of people they are going to turn out to be.
It's the same in most cities, I hear from friends at Uni's around the country. A generation of insulting, untrustworthy, antisocial people is being brought up around the country.
I'm a 20 year old bloke, I can handle little children hurling abuse in the street. But what about other younger "goody goody" children who are unable to defend themselves and the elderly or frail. The streets must be a pretty scarey place for them in Southampton, even in broad daylight.
I wonder what it will be like to live with this countrys society in, say, 15 to 20 years time, when this lot have been through the years of their lives when they "mature" and shape themselves for life.
I guess, by then, handguns will be legal and we'll just kill them all off as we receive one pathetic insult after another. Hooray for Americani
So it appears that Chris is going down with this Freshers Buig. Which made me realise; whilst I've felt shit for a few days, it'll be over and out of the way by the start of my course on Monday.
I'd hate to be going down with it now, it'd only ruin the start of my modules. :-)
I've just sent a letter to NVidia explaining that my GeForce2 is a little out of date, and would they please send me a brand new graphics card along with material for advertising and promotional purposes.
You don't if you don't ask... Fingers crossed, eh?
I have the flu. Little Richard gave it to me, but I bet he got it off some first years. The bastards.
I feel so drained, finding it hard to breath, my bones ache like mad, I'm constantly hot-cold and my room is covered in sneeze.
I want to feel well again!
Yesterday morning I dozily awoke at about quarter past seven. I could have sworn I heard the door bell so got up and looked. Noone there.
Bursting for the loo, I walk through to the toilet and see a tall bloke in the back garden using a mobile phone. This freaks me out a little. Some random in your garden at unheard of times in the morning is really rather worrying.
He walks down the side of the house and I follow him. With a rather fast beating heart, I open the front door to challenge this intruder. Only to find it's Big Richard.
He'd apparantly got back from working at the Cube and realised he'd lost his key. He rang the doorbell once and noone answered. He didn't ring again because he didn't want to wake anyone up!?!
He then decided to try sleeping in the back garden and after an hour was so cold he was on the verge of throwing up. So he decamped to ECS. He got chucked out of there at half six and then went for another look for his keys at the Union. They weren't there.
So he decided to come back at try the house again. But once more, he had no intention of ringing the door bell more than once. He's lucky I needed that wee!
Silly. Silly silly. In future, if anyone is locked out of my house, ring me or keep your finger on the door bell. Noone should be locked out of their own house, especially on a freezing October night.
Latest news is that someone thinks they've seen the keys in the Entertainments managers office at the Union. So he's going to have a look this morning.
Good luck, Rich.
Under a week away from lectures now. It will mean very little to people, I'm sure. But yesterday, I spent an hour or so with the sun coming in through the window, some nice chilled music playing and just reading. It was the first time I've felt properly relaxed in ages. Wonderful.
But we now have our new housemate. We went up to the Union (for the first time this year) with her last night. Had a few drinks and played some pool. General stuff. Nice stuff. I shant describe her or anything right now, she's too quiet to know already.
But we are going to have a gaming day today with 6 of us playing BF1942 and the likes. Exciting. Anyway. Enough of teenage "I did this, then this and this." blogging.
Whilst I'm not posting very much, I thought I'd share a little website with you that is really rather useful.
It provides alternative phone numbers numbers for 0870 and 0845 numbers. So you can call their geographical number (02380 for example) and save a little cash. Hooray.